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Dating 101 For Christians  - Part 2

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Make Yourself Available

I know what you're thinking - 'I'm not desperate' or 'What does she mean by 'available'. I know you are not desperate and what I mean by 'available' is just that - available to go out, available to meet people, available to attend functions or social gatherings. And, yes, I know we are all holy and sold out for God, but there's nothing wrong with going out on a simple date. Let people know what you are looking for in a mate or a friend. Go places where you think you're likely to meet such a person. I'm even a fan of online dating and matchmaking services. At least online, you'll have an opportunity to get to know that person a little bit through email. Just be available - be open to the idea of dating, be open to the idea of meeting new people, be open to the potential of new conversation and including new activities in your life.

Be Interesting Date Company

Okay, you've met some new people, you've scheduled a few dates (where you will meet them on neutral ground) and you're ready to go. There is one very important that thing you must bring on your date - yourself! Be the kind of person you would like to go out with. Be interesting. Be alive. Be informed. You want to get to know this person and allow this person to get to know you. How much interest do you think they will have in someone who answers their questions with one word responses? Not much. There are no formal rules for date conversation, but you must talk! No matter how good a listener you are, eventually the conversation will turn back to you and you will have to say something about yourself. Be ready. Talk about this article. Talk about God. Talk about whatever your heart desires, but be sure to talk!

Follow Up

Make sure you thank your dates for their company. Let them know you enjoyed yourself (if you did) and that you'd like to go out again (if you do). But remember - play it cool! If you say something like, 'I enjoyed myself' and they say little in return, don't say anything else. Dating is a two-way street and if you're the only one participating, you need to find a different road! If the date went well, call in a few days to a week, but be casual. Ask them how they are, what they've been up to. But again, be cool. If they seem interested or excited to talk to you, then follow up with a suggestion for another outing. But if they say little or show minimal interest, just let it be. Say goodbye, wish them a good day and let it go. Because the simple fact of the matter is, if they want to see you again, they are fully capable of saying that for themselves.

Stay Positive and Focused

Remember that even if some of your dates don't turn out so well, it probably has little to do with you and everything to do with them. It's okay if you don't click with someone. It's okay if you don't want to pursue a relationship or they don't. The value in knowing your own self-worth is that you understand that another person's opinion of you does not make or break you. Perhaps that person is not the person for you. Perhaps you've set your aim too high or too low. Re-evaluate, move on, but don't let bad experiences deter you. I've seen many single men and women afraid to go out because they are afraid of rejection and they don't seem to realize that there are other men and women out there who feel exactly the same way they do! Just do it. Go out and have fun. And remind yourself that no matter what happens, this is not the end of the world (or the beginning) and your life will go on, just as happy, just as contented and just as focused as it was before that person came into it.

Pray Always

No matter what stage of the game you're in, pray always. Pray about if you should date, pray about who you should date and pray about your expectations and game plan. God will guide and direct you in anything You seek him for (and some things you don't), so make sure you get His input before you do anything.

So, go out and enjoy yourself. Plan your strategy, use your strategy and pray diligently! And be encouraged, the person you are looking for is probably right around the corner, searching for you as well.

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